Two little words: An image captured in our mind. The dream of a little girl. The hope of a Bride-to-be.
In one silly car ride several years ago, we were driving home from Columbia. A picture-perfect scene: Parents in the front seat, children in the back seat. We’d done this a thousand times, however, this trip is frozen in my mind. As car rides go with your kids, you talk about all kinds of non-sense from who’s “going with who” to how bad the school lunches are to some drawn out, convoluted story that Meghan or Madison heard from a friend who heard from a friend’s cousin’s friend who told them about something crazy they just knew was fact! We listen, we laugh.
On this particular road trip, we came upon the question of what would be our super hero ability. Each of us tried to come up with the most outlandish skill with a story as to why we’d want that ability. Meghan wanted to leap tall buildings, which we predicted would be Macy’s or Dillard’s so she could get to the shoe sales quicker. Madison wanted to have super-human hearing, which we thought was hilarious since she is known for zoning out when TV is on. I wanted to be invisible, which the girls razed me was because I’d just spy on them. Each statement was followed by giggling because of the absurdness of it all! Including Mike. It was a funny conversation. One daughter teased, “Dad, your turn. What would you like?” With a pause, Mike offered that his super-human ability would be to walk his daughters down the aisle when they get married. Upon hearing that, the contest was over. We couldn’t one-up that. His words froze in the air because we realized that while we take his MS for granted, the reality of it, and the progression of it, are ever-present in his mind.
Mike was diagnosed with MS in April of 2004, 8 months after his first symptom appeared. That first symptom appeared out of nowhere in August 2003 at the age of 42. The “quick” diagnosis is the reason he is doing so well handling his disease. In those 8 months, he underwent painful tests to rule out other diseases. And the tests that confirm MS are no walk in the park. They involve a lumbar puncture to remove spinal fluid. The spinal tap was always followed by a “spinal tap headache” relieved only with a “blood patch”. None of those words are pretty by themselves, let alone together. In between the first symptom and the final diagnosis, we went to 7 doctors from optometrists to neuro-ophthalmologists to neurologists. The journey took us from Centralia to Columbia to St. Louis to Columbia again.
The aisle is the dream of every bride. All of her life she envisions making that grand march to join hands with her groom. Meghan has earned that walk. She and Shannon have grown up together and have made all the right choices to be allowed to make that walk together. They met in kindergarten. Their day, their walk, their aisle are coming soon.
But there is another person who has longed for that aisle. Unbeknownst to us, that aisle has been Mike’s clear and present vision. The father-of-the-bride has dreamed since 2003 of being able to make that walk with his daughter. And God willing, in a few years, he’ll get to do it again arm-and-arm with our second daughter.
On May 29, 2010, Mike will dress in his tuxedo and drive us to the church. He’ll look dashing in his tuxedo, but me and for Meghan and Madison, we’ll know that it serves as his cape. At 2pm, on May 29, 2010, all the father-of-the-bride wants to do is put one foot in front of the other and glide down that aisle like a Super Hero.
5 responses to “The Aisle”
Elyne
April 10th, 2010 at 20:52
What a touching story. Thanks for sharing Shelley. Good luck to all of you on May 29th.
John
March 20th, 2010 at 11:40
We were diagnosed not that far apart actually…. I had Lyme since 1990 but they suspected when I got hit with reoccurring symptoms in 2003 and 2004 that it may be MS which is sort of related ….. my official dx was rubber stamped in Dec 2004 …
I didn’t get to walk Amber down the aisle in Sept 2006 though she tried to get me to, I was still at the getting-used-to-the-wheelchair stage, so Justin walked her down
I am so glad Mike will be able to walk Meghan down the aisle, it is an honor a father should not be denied and if I could do it over I would do it differently regardless if I had to roll her or walk her …. but in life we usually have regrets. At least now 4 years later I can at least walk some which is a lot better than it was then.
Mike is a superhero …. stay strong!
Kathy Hasekamp
March 19th, 2010 at 15:54
I already knew that story, it made cry then, it made me cry today and I am betting it will make me cry in May and another time in the future. You have a great talent at telling the story so well to draw us in and make us feel it too. Love you and our Mike the Super HERO!
Centralia Matters. Inspiring words and reflections from a hometown girl
March 15th, 2010 at 16:07
Nancy, you are so sweet to share that. Thank you.
Nancy
March 13th, 2010 at 10:59
I hope he knows that he is already a Super Hero. I see it in Meghan’s eyes and hear it in her voice when she talks about “my dad”.